The 20 signs of a toxic relationship

What are the signals?

Sometimes a relationship that is not going well can still be saved. But sometimes relationships are just purely toxic, and it's better to put an end to it. We share here twenty signals that indicate this. Previously we wrote about four signs that you are dealing with a narcissist. Find that in our other blog below.

Don't worry too much, as most relationships have both healthy and unhealthy aspects, and that's what's so dangerous because the healthy aspects can keep you in toxic or unhealthy relationships. The main purpose of being in a relationship, whether with a friend or partner, must bring you an extra value to happiness and enriching your life. However after the nice first weeks together on a pink cloud,  you start to become more yourself, with all the pleasant and unpleasant habits, and then the relationship can come under pressure. 

Of course you are both different. But not always this will be respected or accepted. The biggest failure in a relationship, is to try to change your partner. We will explain these ins and outs in our next blog. So to make a short story about the unsatisfying situation you can go through, here are the twenty signals of a poisoned relationship:

1. You feel hurt more often than loved in your relationship. 
2. You often feel guilty or ashamed about the way you behave towards your partner. 
3. You're not really looking forward to your time together, it's more of a feeling of 'tolerating' it. 
4. You often worry about how things will go or feel like you're walking on eggshells when you're together.
5. You often complain to others about your relationship.
6. You feel very insecure in the relationship.
7. It gets in the way of other healthy relationships or makes you feel unloved.
8. The relationship is a source of anxiety, which makes you less productive.
9. Your partner tells you that you are lucky to have him or her, because no one else would want you. 
10. You daydream about something that causes your partner to be out of your life. 
11. The relationship causes suffering in other (healthier) relationships in your life.
12. There is emotional, physical, financial or sexual abuse, neglect or exploitation.
13. You stay in the relationship mainly because you don't want to be alone. 
14. You feel like you can't be yourself with your partner, or that you've changed for the worse since he or she came into your life.
15. You stay in the relationship because you think you don't deserve or won't find a better relationship.
16. You stay in the relationship mainly because you feel like you owe the other person something.
17. You stay in the relationship because you think the other person can't live without you or will hurt themselves if you leave.
18. You stay in the relationship mainly because of what it used to be or what it could one day be.
19. People you trust think the relationship is unhealthy.
20. You've worked hard on the relationship, but you don't see a change that makes you feel supported and safe.

If you are in such situation, there can be help through relation therapy. The only really important thing is that you both want to work on it, and you love each other. Our center is open from Sunday till Friday evening. Feel free to contact us.